I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize