4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I want to fling myself into the sun
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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