Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
wow bdsm is so cute
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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