I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
