Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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