Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
