We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
