awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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