I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
