turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Randomize
