Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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