he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Randomize
