you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
