Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Randomize
