You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
foreskin is a definite game changer
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
