she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
