I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize