I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize
