I'm so fucking centered right now
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
