I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Randomize
