escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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