If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
