Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
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