Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize