she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
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