Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize