it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I'm sobbing to NWA
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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