I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
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