We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
