Only a mothe r could love this liver
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I made him laugh his dick is mine
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
