hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize