Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
