The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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