Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
