I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Acid is not a monday night drug
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
lol hangovers are for mortals.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize