whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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