There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
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