The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize