If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
