Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
