i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
A+ Viking dick
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Randomize
