bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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