Pants 0. Shit 1.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize