haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
