Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
So vagazzling was a success
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize