She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
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