Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
