well most of my day revolves around power hour
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Randomize
