i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
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