I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
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