she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize